Beer and painkillers
Hmm. Thursday. Again.
I was feeling a little grumpy and sorry for myself yesterday so I popped into the pub on the way home. I knew mixing painkillers with booze is a bad idea, but I wanted a beer. A frothy pint can clear away a days worth of grumpiness in less then fifteen minutes. They had a new beer there on tap that I had heard of but never tried 'Speckled Hen'. It was pretty good, if different. It had a thick foamy head on it like guinness, but it was not a dark beer. In my mind I kept calling it ‘white’ guinness. It was very smooth and creamy and not too bitter. I still like harps better, but it was a nice change.
So I had one pint. Hmm. Did not feel much. So I had another. And that’s when my brain started rolling about. thrum thrum thrum thrum. I decided to call it quits after that. I told the bartender I had fallen off a roof, and she cheerfully told me that another one of her customers had fallen off the roof just last week. See? Us roof-fallers are fairly common.
I got home with my head lolling about. Once the sun started to go down for a bit I decided to go for a walk to get the circulation going in my legs. I could not find my MP3 player. I had not seen it in months. It’s starting to annoy me that I cannot find it. I looked around for a radio. All I had was some cheap Chinese mass-manufactured fm radio that my sister had gotten free with a bottle of shampoo. It has a knob for a volume, and a button to scan to the next station. That was it. It worked and sounded like crap, but it was something to listen to.
I got down to the lake right when the sun was setting. It was huge on the horizon, a big red bloated ball. I bet it’s what superman’s sun looked like before it blew up. It was nice and breezy down there and there was not any bugs about. A few old timers were fishing with cane poles. Off in the distance some little kids were shrieking at the fact they are little kids.
Walked about halfway down riverwalk and then walked home. It seemed to my injuries a lot of good. My legs no longer hurt, its just my chest and back. My back pain forced me to take a strange rolling gait, like I was a sailor fresh form the seas back on land. But I was moving and not a cripple, so that’s a plus.
Some strange mass has developed in-between my buttock and hip where I landed. When I pull on a pair of pants it feels like there is something in my back pocket. It’s junk in my trunk, and no one is going to get love drunk off that hump. I read up on it and apparently its normal. If I keep my circulation going it will eventually fade away.
I took a bath. It felt heavenly. Between the walk and the bath and some stretching, I thought that perhaps tonight would be the night I could sleep in my bed again. No such luck. My bed is just too soft. If I lay on my one side I lay on my injury and the mystery lump. If I lay on the other side I can feel it pressing down from above. If I lay on my back that little pulled muscle in my back starts to spasm. If I lay on my stomach I feel all three. Finally I sighed and went out into the living room and spent another night sitting upright on the couch. It’s unnatural, but at least I can sleep.
I wonder where I can get a giant granola bar. I want something the size of a VCR tape. Mmm.
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